(in an effort to get into a better blogging habit, i’ve joined the 30 day challenge to blog every day in march)
have a great sense of humor
i tried to think of a million different ways to phrase this. “sense of humor” is usually the number one thing on anyone’s list of what they’re seeking in a significant other. and you know why? because it’s true. i don’t know what i would do without laughter in my life. i strive to surround myself with people who love to laugh, especially at the same things i do, and people who will hopefully laugh at what i have to say as well (you know, with me. not AT me). for the past howevermany months i’ve been utilizing online dating, this is actually pretty easy to spot. if a profile can make me laugh without thinking that you’re a complete creeper at the same time (a surprisingly hard thing to accomplish), i will probably message him. and it’s even better, because i think making humor come across through writing, as opposed to just face-to-face, is actually a talent. even if it doesn’t end up working out, at least i got a good laugh or two out of the read.
respect me, and respect others
one of the criteria i’m going to start implementing on dates is to get at least one date in, early on, where i can see how my dates interact with other people. i’m not talking about at a restaurant, although that is a good place to learn about how someone interacts with others. i really want to see how a date treats people when typical formalities aren’t necessary. i’ll always remember a first date i went on where the guy walked on the curbside of the sidewalk, and made it a point to do so (but without actually calling attention to it). it was probably the most chivalrous thing i’d experienced in my twentysomething dating life. chivalry is not dead! does this person respect his friends, his family, and perfect strangers? it’s not hard to do, but you’d be surprised at how many guys i’ve been on dates with don’t seem to have must respect for anyone except themselves.
external qualities: nerdyish glasses, suit, height
pretty much if a guy has any combination of these external qualities, chances are i will think he is attractive, and he will win my heart automatically. (see also: be jason segel)
i’m not talking about the creepy guy i went on a date with who wanted to take a roadtrip BEFORE WE’D EVEN MET (wow, i’ve dated some winners). more like in the relationship, especially toward the beginning, pull something out of your hat that’s unexpected. and going along with that, be open to MY spontaneity. in my last relationship, i was constantly trying to think of new things to do, only to be seemingly shot down, and we ended up in a boring routine. which was fine, because i loved being with him, but sometimes you just need a little spice, you know? even if it’s just altering the routine for a few hours.
show me your skills
there’s nothing sexier (to me) than a guy who has some talent, and isn’t afraid to show it. personally i love men who can play the piano; the guitar is great, but piano is extra special. bonus points if you sing along while you play. cooking (or the willingness to learn, try, and experiment) is of course another one, as is knowing your way around the hood of a car (typically so you can help me fix mine, WINK). eventually i would love to end up with someone who shares my passion for running, or at least fitness. footrubs are great, too. be good at that. not too much to ask, right?